I want to unsee that...

Yesterday morning, before school, my girl child was looking at facebook and she had a video show up in her feed that I wanted to see.... So I watched it.. I don't know why, it was awful. I caught myself gasping, and pulling away, and crying out at the screen, but not turning away or turning it off, I just couldn't look away, I kept hoping it was some kind of awful joke and it would turn out to not be true.. but it was true.... I've never seen anything so hideous. It was a hidden camera video of a nanny abusing the child in her care. The little girl appeared to be about 1 or 2 years old. I've never seen that kind of evil. It was burned in my mind and I couldn't stop thinking about it. It made yesterday into an awful, horrible, no good, terrible bad day. I felt incredible hatred, anger, and emotions that I didn't even know I was capable of having towards this woman and anyone else who could do this. I know child abuse happens, I just didn't realize it. actually. happens.  Right now I want to change my career to something that protects the babies that are being born into this world, instead of being the nurse helping to bring these babies into the world. What can I do? I feel helpless.. I can't believe we aren't hearing about this and crusading to stop it. Why aren't we doing something? How can we do anything? We don't know which children are being hurt until it's too late. Surely this isn't happening in my town.  

I was able to come home early from school, and I was so thankful, because I desperately needed some time with Jesus. I sat down on the love seat, grabbed Bailey's Bible and held it up, praying that God would please help me, feed me what I needed.. and then I let the Bible fall open.. and read this.... 

"Do not fret because of evil men or be envious of those who do wrong; for like the grass they will soon wither, like green plants they will soon die away. Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in Him and He will do this. He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun. Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him; do not fret when men succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes. Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret, it leads only to evil. For evil men will be cut off, but those who hope in the Lord will inherit the land. A little while and the wicked will be no more; though you look for them, they will not be found. But the meek will inherit the land and enjoy great peace......" Psalms 37:1-11.. 

The whole Psalm spoke calm to me, but I'm only typing out the first part because I'm lazy.. I should mention that God sent several sweet friends into my path yesterday, love and good talks, and the last friend, at the end of this stressful day, grabbed me in a big, tight, friend hug and prayed with me... Wow!! Thank you Jesus! God really does care about every single thing we go through. He really is right beside us, His Spirit in us.. He gives us power to forgive, to love, to stand up for Him, to be bold and courageous, to shine His light for others.. They need Him!